Bipolar Mum Journey

“Be grateful”? VOM. 🤮

Listen, Karen! When I’m having a moan on the internet the last thing I need to hear is “Be Grateful” I am grateful, KAREN. That’s exactly why I’ve managed to build the life I have, holding it together for my kids. Trust me, ending up in the gutter with a drug addiction would’ve been the easier route – but I chose to keep going because I’m grateful for the life I’ve built. So yes, I AM grateful.

I document my life in detail so people can connect with it. So people might read something and think, “You know what? I’ve been through that too. Thank God I’m not alone.” It’s not about sympathy – I hate sympathy. It makes me want to throw up. It’s about showing people the reality behind all this fake social media bullshit. Because let’s be honest, most of us are drowning inside. We’re just paddling like hell to keep our heads above water.

If you’re like me and you’ve got kids, you show up for them every single day so they don’t have to go through what you went through. That’s real, isn’t it?

And this is exactly why services fail. Because the Karens and Jeffreys are running them with their patronising rubbish. Do you know how many people come to me instead of those services? Hundreds. And why? Because I don’t sugar-coat a bloody thing. If someone’s been through sexual assault, domestic violence, addiction – I tell them straight. I tell them the truth about the aftermath: that sex might never feel the same again. That your brain might never work the same again. I don’t slap some false positivity on it and tell them to “be grateful.” Grateful for what? For being violated and beaten? What a stupid, tone-deaf thing to say.

Telling people to “be grateful” is toxic positivity, bollocks. The last thing someone dealing with trauma wants to hear is a fake cheerleader waving a cliché in their face. People want honesty. They need someone real to stand with them.

Oh, and here’s another thing. Unless you’ve run the streets, you won’t understand how bloody hard it is to settle into so-called “normal” life. Why do you think ex-criminals end up as podcasters? Because they need that same adrenaline hit, that sense of status or purpose.

Every single ex-con I work with does something to help others every day. But you won’t see us shouting about it on social media. Why? Because a good deed doesn’t need to be a publicity stunt. And here’s the key to it all: we don’t sit people down and tell them to “be grateful.”

So do me a favour, Karen – read a bloody trauma psychology book. Educate yourself before you open your mouth.

I’m bipolar and what you might call a trauma bae. I will always be grateful for my kids and for my life, but do I feel happy all the time? Not even close. And you know what? That’s fine. I’m allowed to document that. I’ll keep showing people that all the polished crap they see on social media isn’t the full picture.

So once again, Karen: kindly, fuck off.