Bipolar Mum Journey

Narcissists have a way of turning lives upside down, leaving a trail of destruction that can take years to mend, if it can be mended at all. My story is one of those tales, where a once seemingly normal relationship turned into a nightmare of abuse, manipulation, and a desperate struggle to protect my son. But despite my efforts, the system failed us. By sharing my story I’m hoping that others in similar situations can find strength, and that awareness can lead to change.

The Night of the Crime:

It all began with a night that should have been the end of the nightmare, not the beginning of a new one. After enduring years of emotional, psychological and physical abuse from my ex, I finally reached my breaking point. But as anyone who has dealt with a narcissist knows, it’s never simple. Over the coming weeks of the aftermath of my attempt murder arrest, my ex kidnapped my son, cutting all contact with my family. 

This wasn’t just a spur-of-the-moment decision. It was a calculated move by a man who needed to win at all costs, to assert his control and prove that I could never escape him. He knew exactly what he was doing. He didn’t just take my son physically, he started a campaign to erase me from his life emotionally and mentally.

The Flying Monkeys:

Narcissists rarely act alone. They are adept at recruiting others to do their bidding, manipulating them into becoming their “flying monkeys.” These are often friends, family members, or in this case, girlfriends who either believe the narcissist’s lies or are too blinded by their charm to see the truth. My ex was a master of this, surrounding himself with women who would do anything for him, not realising or perhaps not caring that they were helping to destroy a mother’s bond with her child.

These women tormented me relentlessly. They spread lies, attacked me on social media, and even attempted to interfere with legal proceedings. They became a constant, haunting presence in my life, making it nearly impossible to regain any sense of normalcy or peace. And the worst part? They were complicit in my son’s alienation, helping my ex turn him against me.

A Product of His Environment:

As the years passed, my worst fears began to materialise . My son, the innocent boy I had once known, was slowly being moulded in his father’s image. The manipulation, the anger, the disregard for others’ feelings it was all there. I felt helpless as he began to emulate his father’s abusive behaviour , especially towards women.

It was monkey see, monkey do. My ex had successfully created a clone of himself, another man who sees control and domination as the only way to interact with the world, especially with women. My son started displaying the same abusive tendencies towards his girlfriends, and I knew that the cycle of abuse was continuing. I had fought so hard to protect him from this, but it seemed that my efforts were disregarded by the system.

A System That Fails Us:

One of the most frustrating aspects of this ordeal has been the lack of support from the authorities. Time and time again, I reached out for help, hoping that the system would protect my son and me. But the police, the courts, the social services, all of them failed us. They either didn’t see the danger or didn’t care enough to intervene.

It’s a terrifying realisation to know that the very institutions designed to protect us are sometimes powerless against a manipulative narcissist. My ex knew how to play the system, presenting himself as the concerned father while painting me as the unfit mother. And despite the evidence, despite the patterns of abuse, the system allowed him to continue his reign of terror.

The Danger They Pose:

Today, both my ex and my son have become dangerous men. They are men who believe that women and children are there to be controlled, manipulated, and dominated. And yet, they walk free, unchecked, and unchallenged by the authorities.

It is a sobering thought that my son, once the innocent victim, is now a perpetrator of the same cycle of abuse. It is heartbreaking to see him follow in his father’s footsteps, knowing that this was not the life he was meant to lead. But this is the reality of living with a narcissistic parent, their toxicity seeps into every aspect of life, and without intervention, it can become a generational curse.

A Plea for Change:

I share this story not to seek sympathy, but to raise awareness. The system must change. The police, the courts, and all those involved in protecting children need to recognise the signs of narcissistic abuse and take them seriously. We cannot allow more children to be lost to this cycle, more families to be torn apart by manipulative, abusive individuals who know how to play the game.

To those who are in similar situations, know that you are not alone. The fight is long, and the road is hard, but your story matters. Keep speaking out, keep fighting for your children, and never lose hope that one day, justice will prevail.

This is not the end of my story. I will continue to fight for all those who have been silenced by narcissists. Together, we can break the cycle of abuse and create a future where our children are safe from harm.