Gaslighting is among the most detrimental actions one can inflict upon another, often driving the victim to the brink of madness. I firmly believe that my mental health would be significantly different if I had recognised the prolonged gaslighting I endured. Unfortunately, it wasn’t until recently that I understood what gaslighting was. Despite my efforts to project a strong and self-assured persona, I am, in reality, quite vulnerable. I dispute my diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder (ASPD), as I consistently attract individuals with narcissistic tendencies due to my kindness, empathy, and selflessness. I prioritise others’ happiness, often to my own detriment, and while I provide excellent advice, I rarely heed it myself.
Abusers excel at covert manipulation, knowing that you will suppress your emotions to maintain public harmony. When you finally reach a breaking point and react, they ensure it occurs in front of others, branding you as irrational and unstable. If you receive a formal diagnosis, they will spread the news, positioning themselves as your saviour while they erode your confidence behind closed doors. This manipulation extends to your friends, family and even your children, convincing them of your supposed insanity and threatening custody battles to ensure you stay.
Living with an abuser is a perpetual state of fear and stress, always anticipating the next act of sabotage to your relationship with your friends, family or children. Abusers have an uncanny ability to identify and exploit vulnerable individuals.
Gaslighting Red Flags:
Denying events or facts, making you question your memory.
Isolating you from friends and family to increase dependence.
Undermining your confidence by consistently belittling or dismissing your feelings.
Shifting blame to make you feel responsible for their actions.
Exploiting your vulnerabilities and using them against you.
They will buy you something or take you somewhere then throw it in your face for months or even years.
Convincing you they are your saviour or knight in shining armour.
Claim they are the most loyal person you’ll ever meet and that all their ex partners were crazy.
If you find yourself in such a toxic relationship, I urge you to leave for the sake of your mental health, as these individuals never change.
Bipolar Mum Journey 
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